Monday, August 3, 2009

Mourning into Joy

When I was in Marshall, Texas earlier this year, I befriended some cats in the neighborhood.  You can read the beginning of this story in the archives under May 17th “Missy and Mister.”


Shortly after I wrote that, Missy let me touch her!  Then a week or so before I was to leave, she rubbed up against my leg and let me pet her several times.  We were best friends now.  Mom and Dad knew my attachment and suggested I bring her home to Iowa to be a barn cat...


I was certain by now that she was a stray.  She lived in the junk behind the sign painting business next door.  But she wasn’t getting fed there.  Seemingly overnight she became really thin and pitiful looking.  And she begged for food every time I went outside.  I think she ate her weight in Vegannaise and beans every day!  Mister hadn’t shown up for about a week, so Missy ate her portion and his too.


The Saturday afternoon before I was to leave, I was visiting with a lady outside of my trailer when she stopped talking and said “Isn’t that your cat you’ve been feeding?  It looks like she got hit by a car or something.”  I turned around to see Missy come hobbling down the driveway.  Her feet were curling up spasmodically making her stumble and fall over, and her eyes were rolling back in her head.  She had been poisoned (probably with antifreeze)...


I tried to throw a towel over her, to catch her, with hopes of taking her to the vet; or at least try to pour some activated charcoal down her throat to maybe absorb the poison.  But she was still a wild cat and out of her mind because of the poison.  She managed to get away from me every time and finally escaped into the 8 inch culvert that went under the driveway.


The next morning I expected to find her dead in there, and dreaded having to pull her out.  But she wasn’t there!  My hopes of recovery were dashed, though, when I spotted her near the edge of the woods.  She was much worse now... it was awful!  I will spare you the details.  How could anyone poison a cat that way, knowing the agony they go through?  I cried all morning as I prepared to go to work, but crying couldn’t get rid of the feelings I had.  I loved that cat.  And I couldn’t do anything to help her in her pain.


When I got home that evening, Missy had moved again.  I guessed she had drug herself into the woods.  And the next morning my suspicions were confirmed by five vultures who were sitting on the roof of the shed and in the trees, stubbornly refusing to leave even though I walked right up to them and shouted at them to get out of there.  Now I know why the Bible speaks of the birds in Revelation 19:17,18,21.  It is a fitting symbol for finality, a sure sign of death, the end of any possibility of recovery. 



Wednesday night we had a thunderstorm that knocked some limbs out of the trees.  I had to drag one out of the road so I could leave that morning.  As I drug it toward the cyclone fence holding in the neighbor’s junk, I heard a scrambling noise.  My heart mourned as I realized it couldn’t be Missy, but leaped for joy when I saw three pairs of eyes peek out of their hiding places in the junk.  Kittens!  Of course!  Missy was suddenly thin, she ate like a horse, as she was dying she was dragging herself back toward the junk pile.. because she had kittens!


That afternoon I took a lady with me to talk to the sign painting people who owned that junk behind the fence.  When I asked if he knew anything about the cats that were hanging around there he shamelessly said “Yeah, we’ve been trying to get rid of those cats!”  He must have seen the shock and anger in my face because he tried to cover for himself...  I interrupted to ask if he knew that there were three kittens in his stuff back there.  He said “Yeah, we were waiting until they were weaned before we got rid of the mother.  They are about 7 weeks old now.  Two orange ones and a black one.  You can have them if you can catch them.  Ha, ha, ha!”  That was all I wanted to know, so I left.


Mom and Dad were more than willing to have three barn cats - especially Missy’s kittens...  And my friends there, Melanie and Robert, just happened to have cat traps.  The poor things had been orphans for five days now.  The tuna in the traps was more than enough to lure them in.  Their first messes in the cat litter were only grass, bark, and june bugs!  It was Sabbath now and the tuna that Robert gave me for the traps was gone in the first 5 minutes; so the kittens had Vegannaise and spaghetti noodles for their Sabbath meals.  : )



They were VERY wild kittens.  And they were about to embark on a 13 hour drive to Iowa in a cat carrier given to me by other friends, Mr and Mrs McCommon.  I ate breakfast that last Sabbath morning while reading goodbye cards.  Mrs. Vivian Clark’s card had a verse in it about “Faith, Hope and Charity.”  I looked over at three pair of big eyes staring at me from the cat traps and laughed.  Perfect names!  That was the first time I had laughed since Missy was poisoned.  It made me think of the verse “I will turn their mourning into joy; I will comfort them, and give them gladness for sorrow.” Jeremiah 31:13


Frank Faith, Harold Hope, and Charles Charity (wouldn’t you know it they are all boys!) are growing big like their daddy, Mister.  And they are tame now; they all come up to Mom and Dad for “lovin” whenever they see them outside.  They love their new home in Iowa where they have free run of a barn full of mice.  Mom and Dad said they have learned to climb the trees now, and they romp around like little kids out there.  I can’t wait to get home and play with them again.  I thank God for the three blessings that have comforted me and brought so much joy after such a sad situation.  Someday all our mourning will be turned to joy.  (Revelation 21:1-5)











Friday, July 31, 2009

Catching Up

Abstract art has never appealed much to me.  I have always wondered why people who have such talent would want to make something that looks as if they had none.  My suspicions are that they don't have all that much talent in the first place, so they create some rules that they are able to follow and then call it "superb abstract art."  : )

Because I think this way, I am calling the following pictures my abstract photography.  I couldn't get any good, realistic pictures.  This was the best I could do - and they fit into the "abstract" category.  Convenient!

I threw in a few of my "just for fun" shots too.  Like the "I've-been-sitting-in-the-backseat-way-too-long  face."  And the "Green onions destined for a salad."

While home on break, my brother Matt and my friend Jacqueline both gave me crash courses in Photoshop.  I'm posting these pictures now, before I get into all this photo editing stuff, to save me the headache of "fixing" them. : )

I've also added several written posts to the archives, to put them in chronological order.  I won't do that anymore.  This is the last time you'll have to search backwards through them to find something new!  I'm learning!




















Some Pictures from My Break at Home in Iowa

The "beginnings" in Iowa are always so beautiful!








The Omaha Henry Doorly Zoo is always fun!










Hiking in Iowa (and eating mulberries - big ones this year!)





Uncle Kevin and I mowed grass for 5 hours one day with the push mowers.


Even the dirty dishes in Iowa are beautiful!


And the "endings" in Iowa are always beautiful...


Tuesday, July 7, 2009

The Precarius Prayer

I’ve been digesting a book about prayer.  I’m sure you all guessed that by some of the topics on my blog posts.  : )  It’s a book my friend recommended (he also happens to be the author) called “If With All Your Heart” by Richard O’Ffill.


The point I read recently has caused me to think a lot.  The word prayer is derived from the Latin word precarius: obtained by entreaty.  And we still use the word precarious today when things are uncertain, unstable, insecure, dependent on circumstances beyond ones control, dependent on the will or pleasure of another, or liable to be withdrawn or lost at the will of another.


When is prayer precarious?  When you are asking for something, prayer is precarious!  Because when you ask God for something you are allowing Him to choose His response.  The control has been turned over to Him.  You are subjecting yourself to His decision.


When Jesus specifically asked God in Gethsemane, “If it be possible, please take this cup from me.”  He also added, “Nevertheless, not my will but Thine be done.”  He didn’t try to take the control; He was dependent on the Father’s will/choice.


The opposite of such prayer/asking is demanding.  When you tell someone to do something for you, you offer them no option, no free choices.  You take the position of authority and leave them subject to your demands.


I’ve been thinking about my prayer requests.  How many of them are actually prayers?  How often have I “asked” God to help me do this or that, and spelled it all out to the Nth degree, to the point where it was no longer a request but a demand?  


Asking is tough stuff!  It is so difficult for me to turn over the control of even simple things to someone else.  I don’t ask people for things very often.  Probably my parents are the ones I ask the most.  I trust them the most; I know they won’t hurt me when I turn over the control to them.  I accept them as having authority over me.  But even with my parents, I think I usually ask for things I know they will readily agree to do my way.


How do I treat God?  I don’t ask Him for very much either!  I mean, I ask Him for things I know He readily agrees with and will do my way.  But when it gets to things that are really precarious - things that could go either way, things that I WANT to go my way, things that I am tenaciously trying to have control over... then I start off praying and end up demanding!


Getting very personal, I have been thinking about one of my most repeated prayers lately - “Heavenly Father, am I ever going to get married?”  I realize now that I have been quite demanding.  I can only think of ONE time, when I actually asked God for a husband without my pork attached to the bill.  All the other times I have had particular people in mind, or outlined my way and timing, and turned my request into a drive-thru order for God to fill!


Of course it is not wrong to talk to God about specifics, or even ask for things in detail.  But when my asking becomes demanding, my relationship with God is changed.  If I know Him, love Him, and accept Him as having authority in my life (my Creator), will I demand Him to do this or that?  Wouldn’t it be more appropriate to ask God for His choice of husband for me?  Do I have cause to fear that it will be someone I do not like?  


Handing over the control to God is a precarious thing - it’s putting our life in His hands.  It is really asking for something, rather than putting in an order.  It is about a relationship with God that allows Him the freedom to do His good will in our lives.  It is a way to show God that we know Him as trustworthy and love to be at His mercy, in His care, in His arms...


There is a story in the Bible that illustrates this type of asking.  Imagine you are Ruth as you read about her precarious request in the book of Ruth (especially 3:1-9).  How scary would that have been?!  Things certainly could have gone either way!  How demanding was her request?  How much greater was the response than she expected?  How is Jesus like Boaz the “redeemer kinsmen”?


Thursday, July 2, 2009

Enjoy a Rest

“And God cares for everything and sustains everything that He has created.  He who upholds the unnumbered worlds throughout immensity, at the same time cares for the wants of the little brown sparrow that sings its humble song without fear.  When men go forth in their daily toil, as when they engage in prayer... each is tenderly watched by the Heavenly Father.  No tears are shed that God does not notice.  There is no smile that He does not mark.


“If we would fully believe this, all undue anxieties would be dismissed.  Our lives would not be so filled with disappointments as now; for everything whether small or great, would be left in the hands of God, who is not perplexed by the multiplicity of cares, or overwhelmed by their weight.  We should then enjoy a rest of soul to which many have long been strangers.”  Steps to Christ  pg. 86