Indispensable

It is not what one does that makes them indispensable; it is who they are.

My Mom is going to a clinic this Friday to have them look at a lump she has had for about a year now. It may be a fatty tumor and not a big deal at all. But the number of relatives in our family who have died of cancer, and the fact that two people I know lost loved ones suddenly (literally overnight), and the “what if” game that I always seem to play in my mind -- all have combined to cause me painful thoughts and a lot of crying.

Of course I know that God is always with me and with my Mom. I also know that He is in control and doesn’t allow anything to happen that is not for our ultimate good. But that doesn’t mean that Mom will be OK and live forever. In fact, the reality of this sinful world is that she will most certainly die. It’s just a matter of time.

My selfish thoughts ran like this one night: “What would I do if Mom died soon? Who would watch out for me, send me care packages, ask if I am eating enough, spend hours on end helping me balance my checkbook, answer “female issue” questions, straighten out my emotions and hormonal thinking, give me that motherly advice... What if I met someone who wanted to date me and Mom wasn’t around to talk to? [Of course my Dad is there for me! But everyone knows that a Dad can’t be a Mom in such situations - and visa versa.] What if I got married and she wasn’t there to see? What if I had kids someday and Mom wasn’t around to ask advice from? How bitterly painful it would be to have so many things to want to tell her...”

The thought came to mind that God would provide someone to take that place for me. I know many women who would gladly do their best to be a mom to me. But this thought didn’t help AT ALL. No doubt God would provide someone to do the things a mother would do for me. But no one can be Mom! It isn’t what Mom does that makes her indispensable to me; it is who she is.

In this age of materialism, life is all about producing -- work, work, work, accomplish, succeed, make it happen... It’s so easy to be sucked into the thinking that it is what people do that makes them worth something. We even see this thought in the opposite end of the spectrum. Those who have done something terrible in the past are considered to be more worthy of resentment. We value people according to what they do instead of who they are.

Considering the possible loss of my Mom has given me a new perspective on the value of each person. It’s not what you do that makes you indispensable; it is who you are.